Amanda – The Hottest Girl in Year 9
They see us coming as they are standing by their lockers. They turn to flee, but Bec, Suze and Trace are approaching from the other end of the corridor blocking their path.
“Beat it.” I say to Riley’s friends.
Riley tries to go with them but Suze pushes him back. “Not you.”
“Hi Riley. We need a word.” I say as Em holds the door to Girls South loos open. “Step into my office.”
He reluctantly goes in. There are a couple of girls at the basins and they look up to see what the commotion is as we enter. I gesture with my head for them to leave and they scurry out in a flash. Perhaps getting girls out of loos is my superpower?
We have Riley cornered against the back wall.
“How’s it going Riley?” I say as the rest of the girls look on. He just fidgets while looking nervously past us towards the door.
“We’re all friends, right?”
He nods and bites his lip.
“That’s great. Because it would be such a shame if something happened and we couldn’t be friends any more.” I say with faux innocence.
“Such a shame.” echoes Suze looking menacingly at Riley.
“Which is why I was so surprised when Ms Briggs said she didn’t know anything about a Sex Ed survey. Some of the girls thought you might have made it up, but I said ‘No, Riley would never do that to us. We’re his friends. There must be some sort of misunderstanding.'”
Riley just stands there looking nervous.
“So, Riley. Can you clear this up for us and we can all have a good laugh about it?”
“Ah.” says Riley suddenly finding a spot on the floor to be particularly interesting.
“Of course if you had made it all up that would be perfectly understandable. It was just a bit of harmless fun, wasn’t it?” I say acting all reasonable.
Riley looks up, the relief clear on his face.
If he thinks he is getting out of it that easy, boy is he wrong. We are going to make him pay. Big time.
“Right girls? It wasn’t as if there was anything personal in it.” I say flatly.
The girls all pretend to consider this.
“I don’t know Am. There was the question about cup size.” says Em.
“Knicker style and color was a bit personal.” says Mich.
“Contraception is personal.” says Trace.
“Sexual preference is personal.” says Bec.
“Asking about positions was a bloody cheek.” says Suze glaring at Riley.
“Well, I suppose some people might consider number of partners personal.” I say.
Riley is looking nervous again as he looks around.
“Riley, Riley, Riley.” I say shaking my head. “This is all very disappointing. We thought you were our friend. What are we going to do about this?”
“Um. I didn’t tell anyone.” he says. “Ah. It was just a laugh. Right?”
“So we must have imagined that Facebook post then?” says Bec coldly.
“Ah.” he says focusing on the floor again.
“Let me have him Am. I’ll make him sorry alright.” says Suze threateningly.
Riley stares back at Suze and swallows. Hard.
“What do you think girls? Should we let Suze sort it out?” I say.
“I don’t know Am. Remember what happened to Adam Patterson?” says Mich faking looking concerned.
“Who’s Adam Patterson?” says Riley.
“Exactly.” says Suze and Riley swallows again.
“Yeah. Suze can be a bit extreme. Perhaps there’s something Riley can do to make it up to us.” I say staring at him. “Well?”
“Ah. I promise I’ll never do it again.” he says.
“What you reckon girls? Do you think that will do it?” I say.
“Okay Suze, he’s all yours.” I say
Suze takes a step towards him as he cowers against the wall. But Bec holds her hand out to stop her.
“The Student Council is looking for more entries for the Year 9 Fancy Dress Day. Perhaps he could help with that?” says Bec as if the idea had only just occurred to her. “We really could use the extra funds to reach our target.”
“Yeah Riley. Could you help with that?” I say.
“What would I go as?” he says.
“Well. You wanted to know what it’s like to be a hot chick. Here’s your chance to find out.”
“You mean dress up … like a girl?” he says in horror.
“Yeah. You’d be alright with that, wouldn’t you? It would be a laugh.” I sneer. “Unless you would like to discuss it with Suze first?”
Suze is looking at him the way a cat looks at a cornered mouse while it decides how it is going to play with it’s new friend. Riley looks nervously back and forth between Suze and myself, saying nothing.
“Good. That’s settled then. We’ll see you on Wednesday to organise your costume.” I say.
He nods glumly.
“And Riley, don’t even think about backing out. We wouldn’t want to have to send Suze around to see if you were alright now would we?”
“He’s going to fall over walking like that.” says Jordan watching Riley stagger towards us. “Nice job on the legs by the way.” he says laughing.
“You should have heard the whining while we shaved them.” I say rolling my eyes. “We told him if he didn’t be quiet we’d wax them. That shut him up.”
We’d done the best we could. The long blonde wig had been easy enough. One of mum’s old bras and a lot of padding added the curves. All of our dresses were way too small, but asking around and a few adjustments had sorted that. Shoes had been a problem.
I stand up and yell across the quad.
“Rilene! You walk on those heels properly. Like we showed you.”
Riley straightens up a bit and slowly makes his way over to our table. Some of the boys give wolf whistles as he approaches.
“Don’t think you’re taking them off if you break the heel. We took ages to find heels in your size and walking on a broken heel is not fun.” I say when he reaches us.
“Who’s the new girl Am? I’ll take care of her.” yells Mark from the next table. “Real good.” and he gestures exactly how he would do that while his mates laugh and slap him on the back.
“Ignore them.” I say to Riley, who’s looking nervously at the boys. “And stop fidgeting.”
“But my knickers are up my bum.”
“They’re g-string. They’re meant to be up your bum.” I say with my eyes open wide at him. “Where’s our lunches?”
“Five garden salads and a Kit Kat.” he says as Trace lunges across the table to grab the Kit Kat. She holds it close to her as she rips open the packet, breaks off a finger and starts nibbling on it with her head down.
The rest of the girls take a salad each. Riley just stares at the remaining salad in front of him.
“Eat your lunch.” I say.
“What? Rabbit food? Is that all?” he says looking at me in surprise.
“Yes. You eat what we eat.”
“Why can’t I have chocolate like her?” he says gesturing at Trace.
Bad move. Trace doesn’t often get her period but when she does everyone knows about it.
She snaps her head up nostrils flaring.
“Why don’t I kick you in the nuts until you bleed, then you can have chocolate too.” she snarls.
As quickly as it built, the anger dissipates and Trace puts her head down and sobs. Mich and Em comfort her; Em glaring daggers across the table at Riley.
Bec leans in from the other side of Riley and quietly says “I’d let that one go if I were you.”
He takes Bec’s advice and reluctantly starts on his salad without saying anything else.
He’s finished his salad in no time and looking around sees the cherry tomatoes that Bec has been saving for last.
“Can I have them?” he says to Bec.
“No!” says Bec pulling her salad towards her protectively. “You’ve had yours.”
“But I’m still hungry.” he whines.
“If you’re a hot chick, you’re always hungry. Get used to it.” says Bec.
“You’ve messed up your lippy.” says Mich getting up to come round the table to reapply it.
Jordan leans over to me from the next table and says “Isn’t that your Rainbow Red?”
“Ah ha.” I reply. “You should know. You’ve seen it often enough.”
“What?” says Riley overhearing our conversation. The horror is clear on his face as he madly starts trying to rub the lippy off.
“What are you doing!?” says Mich.
“But … but … I know where it’s been.” says Riley
“You idiot! It’s a fresh tube. As if we’d share our makeup with you.” says Em.
“And where do you think these lips have been?” I say with faux innocence.
“Virgin.” taunts Bec.
Riley blushes with embarrassment as we all laugh at him.
“It’s ten to bell” says Em looking at her phone.
“Let’s go” I say as we all get up and head off to the loos taking Riley with us.
Entering the East Block loos we attract a bit of attention as the girls all look at Riley. What else were we supposed to do? ‘She’ could hardly go to the boys loos.
“Oh be still my beating heart for on yonder is the girl of my dreams.” says a male voice.
“Simon. Really. We are not going to let you in here if you are going to go all campy on us.” says Bec as Riley tries to hide behind us.
“But the gossip is so much better in here.” says Simon. “Did you hear what Meagan did?”
“No! Do tell.” says Mich and they go into an animated huddle.
A couple of the Year 8’s, Peng and Charlotte, come up to us, with Charlotte practically pushing Peng in front of Riley.
“Hi.” says Riley and they both giggle.
“We think you are being very brave doing this.” says Charlotte as Peng nods.
“Just doing my bit for a good cause.” says Riley.
We all look at each other and roll our eyes. If only they knew.
“I hope you’ve voted for me?” he says with a smile.
The girls giggle some more. We were never like that.
“Oh, yes. Peng’s even voted for you ten times.” says Charlotte as Peng blushes.
Bec’s idea of allowing multiple voting for the fancy dress competition was a stroke of genius. At a dollar per vote this will really boost their fund raising efforts.
Riley gives them both a beaming smile.
“Let me repay you by taking you to the shops after school.” he says with a smirk.
This brings on another fit of giggles.
“Peng would love to.” says Charlotte excitedly.
“Charlotte!” says Peng making eyes at her friend.
“I’ll see you at the main gate after last bell then.” Riley says to Peng.
“Okay.” squeaks Peng before she and Charlotte hurry away in excited discussion.
“Incredible.” says Bec shaking her head. “There’s only one other boy in this school that could pick up in the girl’s loos.”
“And I’m pretty sure Jordan has never worn a dress.” I say.
“What can I say ladies? I’m a chick magnet.”
“Full of it more like.” says Em.
We head around the dividing wall to the stalls and are brought up short by the sight of Ashleigh and Steph pashing against the far wall. Riley is frozen on the spot, staring, mouth open.
“Haven’t you seen people kissing before?” says Em.
“But … but … they’re girls!” says Riley eventually.
“You don’t say.” says Mich sarcastically.
Bec hasn’t moved and is silently watching the pair.
“Are you okay?” I ask quietly. It’s never good when an ex has moved on.
“She’s been sending her love poems daily.” she says without looking away from them. “I give it a week.”
Some girls finish up and we take their places.
“Has anyone got a spare shove up?” says Trace from a couple of stalls along.
Doesn’t that girl ever bring her own? Just because she doesn’t often get a period doesn’t mean she can sponge off everyone else.
“Hang on Trace. I’ve got one.” I say reaching into my purse for a tampon.
I hold it under the dividing wall for the next girl to pass along.
Then I realise that its Riley in the next stall.
“Pass it on Riley.”
“Riley, its just a tampon. Its not going to bite. Pass it on.
“Riley if you don’t pass it on right now I’ll start describing what it will look like after its been used.”
I feel a hand take the tampon and shortly Trace says “Thanks Am.”
What is it with boys and periods? I will never understand.
At afternoon recess the whole school assembles in the quadrangle for the results of the Fancy Dress Day.
“Thank you everyone for your contributions to this year’s Year 9 Fundraising event” says Old Four Eyes overlooking us while standing on the podium.
“Especially the entrants who had made such an effort. Well done.” she says turning slightly to look at some of the better ones standing on stage behind her. “Now here are the results. Rebecca.”
“On behalf of the Student Council I would like to thank everybody for your participation.” says Bec. “Don’t these costumes look great?”
There’s a round of polite applause and a few cheers before Bec moves on.
“So, in third place we have Nicholas as Harry Potter, raising $271. Thanks Nicholas.”
He takes a bow and there’s a round of applause, I don’t know why. It’s not much of a costume as he already had the hair and glasses, all he needed was a stick.
“Next in second place we have Georgia as Katniss Everdeen, raising $538. Doesn’t she look amazing?” says Bec
There’s applause and some cheers as Georgia gives the crowd a wave. She really does look amazing as Mich gave her the full treatment.
“Unfortunately there can only be one winner because you all made such a fantastic effort” says Bec turning to the entrants. “However the outstanding entrant, having raised an incredible $1,785, is -”
Bec pauses and looks around for effect. You can hear a pin drop.
“Rilene, The Hot Chick!”
The crowd goes wild with loud cheering, screams, applause, and even wolf whistles. I turn to Suze standing next to me and we give each other a high five. They’re still cheering while Rich take photos of Bec presenting Riley with the trophy.
All people, places and events depicted are real, just not in this universe.
© Paul Shipley